Archive for 2010

Tweets

  • 12:34 @eroticbpm intended ham was on super-sale but cool meat guys hooked me up w/ higher end uber-delish ham. Really nice of them. PB&J yum too. #
  • 16:29 RT @Frauenfelder FreeCreditReport.com charges $1 so it can avoid FTC’s disclosure regulation for "free" credit reports. bit.ly/aQo9pA #
  • 22:28 Chortling over demotivational poster designed by close friend who may in hiding for life if he ever releases it virally into the wild 😉 #
  • 02:04 @V6ughn Aren’t elephant tranqs kinda hardcore for just a nap or are you really stressed out? #
  • 02:05 @juliesimone7 That’s so cute! Is that your tech support team? 🙂 #
  • 02:07 @almostevil I thought Shakira was super hot in that hip shaking video she first broke in America w/, but not totally moved by anything since #
  • 02:10 @ForrestBlack Thank you! Glad it cracks you up too. 🙂 I should link that up as well. #
  • 02:10 Blue Blood Hearts Michael Lore’s Tits n’ Ass and Police Fantasy Football bit.ly/9dsHck #
  • 02:21 @t
    hechaz     Alas we will be sleep-twittering from our implanted iPads that we feel oddly disconnected & isolated for how mega-connected we are. #

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Easter at the Harvard Club Leads to Naked Punks with Bunny Ears and Plushes

Easter at the Harvard Club Leads to Naked Punks with Bunny Ears and Plushes

by Amelia G : April 2nd, 2010

kess velocity cosplay naked easter bunny lori mannWhen I was around five-years-old, my father took me to the Easter Egg Hunt at the Harvard Club. Everything was colorful and I loved the puzzle of looking for all the hidden things. It was like hide-and-seek only better. When my father pointed out that I could find more foil-wrapped candies by looking for a glint in the grass, from a distance, when the sunlight hit them, I thought he was pretty much the most brilliant person on the planet. It was awesome. I thought we should go to events like this basically every weekend.

Children weren’t usually allowed to run around and play at the Harvard Club. Heck, I’m not sure what year they even started letting grown female alumni in, much less playful little girls. I don’t think I knew what Easter was at the time. I certainly could not have held forth on how it was a holiday the early Christians copied many Pagan tropes from, in the successful attempt to subvert the rites of spring into a celebration for a slaughtered deity who walked on earth and came back to life vampire zombie style. I’m not sure I even knew what a yearly holiday was at the time. Or a year. I probably really did ask to go do it again every weekend. Eventually I was told that we were not going to do it again.

This is pretty much my childhood in a nutshell: I was privileged to do one or another fabulous thing briefly and then it was taken away with no explanation a child could understand.

I somewhat predictably ended up pioneering erotica where every day could be a holiday, in this case Halloween.

I had intended to . . .

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Tweets

  • 03:05 Got hooked up with different ham from expected today, but I think was even better than planned! Super yum 🙂 Must not overeat leftovers #

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  • 18:44 Easter at the Harvard Club Leads to Naked Punks with Bunny Ears & Plushes bit.ly/cqkHs7 SFW #

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Naked Easter (PICS)

A gothic punk deathrock plush bunny keeps the gorgeous Stephy Slaughter company in this naked Easter shoot by yours truly and Forrest Black. You can see more in the free Easter photo gallery and the whole series in the Blue Blood VIP. Here is a teaser for another Blue Blood Easter shoot by my pal Lori Mann.

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Sea Monsters in Butter Sauce

Sea Monsters in Butter Sauce

by Amelia G : April 1st, 2010

sea monster bug isopod submarine robotMy friend Funkatron called my attention to the impending sea monster invasion with his usual calm cool and collected demeanor: “Yep, the robot is coming up, looks gooHOLY FUCKING SHIT OH MY GOD OH MY GOD GAAAAAHHHHHHHHHHHHH” That would be the precise quote.

Apparently, in these last days before the apocalypse, even scientists require something called a “green gossip” site in the form of something named Ecorazzi. Catchy name anyway. At any rate, Ecorazzi reports that the creepy sea monster pictured here (and way bigger on their blog where you should totally check it out) is real. It is something called an isopod and was found somehow attached to a robot submersible which was sent down 8,500 feet in the Atlantic to see what it could see. Apparently, what it saw was a little horror-movie-invasion-from-the-sea. Which was still stuck to the robot sub when it got back to the surface, where us land people reside.

My family used to like to go to Cape Cod and Maine in the summertime. So I ate a lot of lobster as a kid. I don’t eat it in California, even when menus have it, because lobster travels poorly. They ship it live, but this is (a) kind of inhumane from the perspective of someone who buys eggs laid by free range . . .

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Tweets

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Tweets

  • 19:21 @DeviantNation I emailed but your DNS is down. Is there a Gmail or chat or something like that I can reach you at? Lost your AIM. #
  • 19:34 Telling u what? @ebertchicago A few tattoos on a woman r ok A butterfly a tiny star After that she’s telling me something I don’t want 2know #
  • 20:11 @dominadoll Go girl! RT @BlueBlood Have you read the ingredients on your lube? www.blueblood.net/2010/03/poison-ingredients-in-lube/ #
  • 20:12 @RaygunRobyn @DesignerJim I think y’all are on to something LOL #
  • 20:17 @Margoandhow @ebertchicago Love > 1 Award. Parsing 2 closely, I’m sure I could briskly find inked chick penetrated w/an Oscar. #
  • 20:18 @funkatron HAM BONE needs no permission ;p #
  • 20:21 @DesignerJim I saw one DVD’s worth. Hats off to their success, but I found it oddly overrated. #
  • 22:14 @DesignerJim It kinda pisses me off that I told @revmitcz something personal relating to that biz plan & now everyone makes analogy unattrib #
  • 22:21 @DesignerJim Can you be more specific please? lol #

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Country Club Dude Bangs Hos, Gay Guy Gay, Guy Who Stepped Out on Wife Stepped Out on Wife, American

Country Club Dude Bangs Hos, Gay Guy Gay, Guy Who Stepped Out on Wife Stepped Out on Wife, American Idol Has a Couple Appealing Contestants

by Amelia G : March 31st, 2010

janine lindenmulderEveryone in Los Angeles has been getting sick. It is this horrible bug which seems to repeatedly seem to improve and then relapse and tends to turn into pneumonia. It is bad enough that the touring group for this season of American Idol was largely decided on the basis of who could sing best through a sore throat. It seems like almost everyone I know has had this thing. I am no exception and yesterday was my first full day back at work, after like a month. For a workaholic like myself, no matter how much I’ve automated large portions of my business, being too sick to work a full day is pretty much torture.

Today, I have been reviewing what has gone on in the world for the past month. Apparently, the news is all OMG DOG BITES MAN. The “news” that Ricky Martin says he is gay was so blockbuster that it took down his webservers. Unless I get to personally watch Ricky Martin fuck, I’m more interested in the fact that Livin’ La Vida Loca and She Bangs are two of the best songs ever to shake an ass to.

I know I’m late to comment on the Tiger Woods absurdity and South Park has thoroughly and eloquently covered the topic with Sexual Healing, but seriously, that was news? News bulletin: Sometimes rich and powerful country club dudes marry the sorts of women who make good mothers and hostesses and still bang the occasional cocktail waitress or hooker or rebellious college student on the side. This has been the case like since the invention of rich and powerful dudes. The wife or queen or whatever would probably prefer not to have her face rubbed in it or be asked about it by reporters or have everyone know, but, if your partner is a wants-crazy-specific-sex-with-different-people-a-lot person, you just know.

Speaking of which, as a result of the Jesse James “news”, my cell phone messages voicemail got full last week and my email, texts, and various SNS and chat applications all blew up with folks wanting to get photos of girls who banged Jesse James and quotes from me on the topic. It is true that I have a database of probably thousands of tattooed girls willing to get naked and some of them would undoubtedly sleep with a reality show star (like Jesse James) or a paid dude (like Jesse James) or a hot guy with nice tattoos (like Jesse James). I’d like to say that none of the inked up hotties I know would sleep with a married . . .

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Have you read the ingredients on your lube?

Have you read the ingredients on your lube?

by Amelia G : March 30th, 2010

poison lube domina dollOver at Pop My Cherry, writer Domina Doll has written an excellent and informative article about reading the ingredients on your lube. It is called Lubes 101 – Harmful Chemicals and Body Burden. I first came across Domina Doll’s writing at AltPorn.Net and then her site when she commented on my Amelia G blog and I have to say I like her style and I like her take on human sexuality. So many female sex bloggers are just trying to get someone to call them pretty (without having to do sit-ups), that I find it enormously refreshing whenever I find a sexpert woman who is actually being an author and sharing valuable information in an entertaining well-written fashion.

Lubes 101 – Harmful Chemicals and Body Burden breaks down what each of many potentially harmful lubricant ingredients can do to the human body. Domina Doll covers parabens, diethanolamine, glycerine, Menthol and peppermint oil, petrochemicals and natural oils, propylene glycol, polyethylene glycol (PEG), L-arginine, aluminum sulphate, Benzocaine, and — my personal favorite — Nonoxynol-9.

I wrote a little humor piece about my experiences with Nonoxynol-9 for the punk humor zine BLT :: Black Leather Times a while back and you can read an archived digital version of Committing Spermicide online still. The upshot of it was that I was violently . . .

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A Little Humanity

A Little Humanity

by Amelia G : March 12th, 2010

corey haim rip man's inhumanity to manSometimes it makes me sad that our society has become more receptive to a kind obituary than to giving props to the living. Then again, I think people who are hostile to the grieving deserve a special place in Hell and I do think it is extremely important to honor the dead when they pass.

I found it surreal how many of my friends recently posted that Corey Haim was their first celebrity crush. He wasn’t my type, but his work obviously touched a lot of people. Yet the main feedback he got, while he was alive, was pretty negative. Somehow the way Corey Haim’s accomplishments peaked early made it acceptable for people to mock him when he was down. TMZ never runs an article about how someone who couldn’t hold down a job as a fry cook looked like death warmed over when they went to the supermarket the other day. But, if someone has a few accomplishments under their belt, then rumors of their marriage failing, details of their special sexual needs, and unflattering photos of them double-parked outside the Pinkberry for a yogurt during their time of the month are all fair game.

I am not a public figure, but maybe I wanted to be . . . before the internet came along and gossip media wildly outpaced more traditional entertainment journalism. I sure as heck have no desire to be a public figure now. I know absolutely nothing about Brad Pitt’s creative process, yet it is a challenge to avoid finding out when he is rumored to . . .

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Classic Vamp Sexiness & Bikini Girls with, err, Shotguns (PICS)

[info]forrestblack and I have photographed Lori the Gory in a number of different lights. To prove it, here are two sample shots from recent Blue Blood VIP updates. The first is a classic vampire sexy image and the second demonstrates that she does not go up in a puff of smoke when struck by the glowing California sun. These images are from her sixth and seventh appearances on BlueBlood.com

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Tweets

  • 01:59 Based on contacts I know now, LinkedIn figured out to suggest someone I went to HS with. In the Middle East. Surreal but kinda cool. #

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