Archive for 2008

• 08:54 @goddesskring Cool! I think your cat is mostly happy about the snow and that’s a smile 🙂 #
• 08:54 The rest of the country might have snow, but at least Hollywood is having a beautiful rainy day today. Going to get coffee and buy eggs. #
• 11:27 @raquelita Blanks from Office Depot and a color printer? #
• 11:27 @Very_Wiley People keep sending me the Milgram cover song story like it was my fave experiment ever or something. #
• 11:51 @Very_Wiley I prefer Milgram, but I feel everyone should be compelled to be a subject in one or the other at least once. #
• 11:52 My coffee was delicious, but I’m having trouble seeing out of my right eye. Making it hard to focus on screen. #
• 11:56 Glitter and Funny Hats Are Better Than Suicide tinyurl.com/8p6ccy #
• 22:09 @ForrestBlack If there is no Santa & no sexy, how do you explain this?: tinyurl.com/8oakhh #
• 22:12 @tmronin Fax machine scene in Office Space one of best moments in cinema. Ever. #

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Sucking on Elf Ears and Castle After-Parties

by Amelia G : December 20th, 2008

So I am just clocking in for a day at the orifice, watching porn movies based on World of Warcraft. There are a group of magical “whores” on a quest to battle an evil darkness spreading through the land. The fantasy quest episodes open with some appropriately mood-setting medievalist-feeling music and then get down to doing battle or doin’ it. A demon directs a threesome. An elf gives a pirate her booty in exchange for something decent to wear. Delightfully, a magic-user, played by Bianca Dagger, makes a special prismatic rock a lil bigger for a lesbian tryst. There is a recurring motif of characters, momentarily befuddled by magic and illusion, coming to their senses and being like, “OMG, what did I just do?” The best of these is when a Paladin, played by Monica Mayhem, suddenly snaps out of it and declares that she would never fuck a barbarian . . . while his splam is still on her face.

I think that these swords and sorcery sex videos would have been perfect viewing material when I was Treasurer of Science Fiction Club in college. The sort of group experience where everybody would have gone around afterward for weeks saying, “I would never fuck a barbarian.” Which would be pretty awesome.

The Whore Lore episodes are directed by Dez and the stories are mostly by Dez and Staci with a screenwriting assist from Marcus London. Marcus London also plays a well-built, tattooed, red-cloaked rough partner for some of the whores. He looked familiar and I figured out that I didn’t recognize him for his 2007 win for Best Oral Sex Scene, but I did recognize him because he played a pornstar in a scene . . .

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• 13:00 @ForrestBlack Doughnut kindness is always a good omen. #
• 13:04 Delicious breakfast. Worked all morning. May need coffee to seek Hunky Santa tinyurl.com/8p6ccy #
• 19:13 @feminasty Thanks for the add. You might like www.spookycash.com as a source o’ dough for your blog. #
• 19:14 @goddesskring Ooh, weather sounds cool! #
• 19:16 @violetblue Nice your kitty looks fab, but that is really surreal. #

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Glitter and Funny Hats Are Better Than Suicide

by Amelia G : December 21st, 2008

All that glitters may not be gold, but I love it. I am a magpie for tinsel and colored lights. I think Santa hats are all adorable.

Only I’m not a holiday person. My parents eloped and haven’t been cool with a special occasion since. They would rather see their offspring any day of the year which does not fall on a holiday, birthday, or other special commemorative occasion. So I admit that the whole December freak-out thing misses me. Occasionally other people get me thoughtful gifts and I appreciate them. But mostly I enjoy the decorations and the eating a lot.

Many people believe that suicide rates climb through the roof during the Winter Solstice, Xmas, Chanukah, Kwanza, etc. season. Countless serious psychological studies and demographics analyses have entirely debunked the notion that suicides go up during Christmas. In point of fact, on average, fewer people either commit suicide or attempt suicide (parasuicide is the bonus vocabulary word of the day!) around the December 24 and December 25 dates and the month surrounding them.

The faulty theory is that lonely people are made more aware of their loneliness during a time of year when others can be visibly seen getting their connectedness groove on. There is also the Seasonal Affective Disorder concept that those afflicted with SAD (Sometimes a cigar is just a cigar!) are more, uhm, sad during the less sunny months. Unless they get high end tanning beds under the tree.

The reality of Christmas suicide is that people socialize more in December. They eat more delicious food in December. They deny themselves less in December. They reach out and connect with their fellow man better in December. So they may be more stressed, but they are . . .

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• 18:47 @babysinead Macy’s has a bizarrely awesome pillow selection and everything is on super sale there now with the economy. #
• 18:48 @jonnyilluminati Is Viggo extra good on painkillers? #
• 18:58 @JasonCalacanis Quantcast is inaccurate too because it guesstimates surrounding sites. Your Google Analytics idea is brilliant! #
• 19:00 @ForrestBlack Lizard People got robbed! #
• 19:09 @BellaVendetta66 Quote actually on BA.com from one girl "I’m a burningangel contract girl. muhahahahha" Doesn’t get clearer than that. #
• 19:35 Sometimes I really really wish I had more peers. Not in sense of equals, but just creative professional women like me I hung out with often. #
• 19:49 @BellaVendetta66 You’re smart enough to answer the question of why you thought BA didn’t have contract girls & what is wrong contract girls. #
• 19:54 @BellaVendetta66 When someone posts info online & then wants links to all places they posted, what poss purpose except to change history? #
• 20:07 @BellaVendetta66 I have no prob w/BA having contract girls. Why are you getting emotional about this? I like you. Relax. #
• 20:19 @mitchfontaine Hi baby 🙂 What do you mean? #
• 20:23 @BellaVendetta66 How is asking you why you think contract girls are bad or not alt an attack? I’m totally baffled. #
• 20:27 @mitchfontaine It is not party time yet in Hollywood. What are you doing tweeting and not from your phone at this hour? ;-p #
• 20:31 @BellaVendetta66 Uhm, retweet "I didn’t know lazerbunny had contract models. That seems kind of um….un "alt"" #
• 20:32 @BellaVendetta66 "what’s "alternative" about owning a girl’s image and rights to work for other people?" #
• 20:33 @mitchfontaine @BellaVendetta66 Just pointed out all alt major players have contract girls & asked how social pressure was better/more alt. #
• 20:35 @jonnyilluminati You sufficiently un-drugged for brunch Monday or dinner tomorrow? #
• 20:37 @mitchfontaine Scroll back. It’ll give you a Twitter intro crash course. #
• 20:38 @funkatron @jonnyilluminati Is bro-style from 3 diff cities via overpriced cell phones? LOL #
• 20:41 @mitchfontaine It’s the only way you are going to learn Twitter. It is for your own good. #
• 20:47 @funkatron You should get a Deadwood tailcoat and then it would just look eccentric, instead of OCD. #
• 20:54 @BellaVendetta66 You mentioned girls feel BV is worth doing for no $. Diff people want diff things. If Stoya got DP contract via LB… #
• 20:57 @tmronin As far as I know, SG will work with girls who work with Blue Blood before they do, while they do & after they do. No probs here. #
• 20:58 @BellaVendetta66 I’ve heard that, but not directly from Stoya, but could be appealing to girl. Bad if he was mean to @babysinead so jury out #
• 21:00 @tmronin And that’s not the new SG contract; that’s always. Then again Blue Blood predates SG by 9 yrs, so maybe Blue Blood is special there #
• 21:01 @mitchfontaine Ok, I confess. @BellaVendetta66 and I just cooked up this plot to get you a Twitter account. #
• 21:03 Leave y’all with Sucking on Elf Ears and Castle After-Parties (PICS) tinyurl.com/8yz9za Peace. Amelia Out. #

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(Image Courtesy of Blue Blood)

From this..

Just had to share. I’m going to go cook cheeseburgers now.

• 13:57 @funkatron Thanks for the DVDs!!!! #
• 14:02 @BellaVendetta66 BlueBood & BA have the occasional contract girl. All SG talent are contract girls. Has some pluses but not what I prefer. #
• 14:02 @Very_Wiley Feel better, brain. #
• 14:03 @ForrestBlack I’ll ride shotgun, if you’ll be the wheelman. #
• 14:06 @raquelita Ba, ha, ha, ha! Better etiquette would be "Happy Communion and Celebrating the Birth of the Baby Jesus Christ, Our Lord" #
• 14:07 @aagblog Good luck in Legal Land. #
• 14:08 @BellaVendetta66 @babysinead Why does everyone hate LB? I didn’t get the memo. Please advise. #
• 14:09 @jonnyilluminati Check your messages on www.blueblood.net Let’s hang out this weekend! #
• 14:10 Jax – The Horror and Gore Interview by yours truly tinyurl.com/3m4meu Also free tattoo hottie pics. #
• 14:51 @babysinead Doubt LB makes enough to pay top $ but no pt working 4 less if not cool Girl travels 3k miles, don’t change $ Hate deal changers #
• 14:52 @babysinead And you are one of the most articulate people in this. Belittling *you*? #
• 14:54 Must leave house & buy food. Down to pasta & brussel sprouts & I eat low carb so the pasta is not that helpful. No energy. May be too late. #
• 17:15 Bristol Farms insane and out of lots. Still have to stop at Erewhon. #
• 05:36 @BellaVendetta66 Sick to death of orgs pressuring socially & thinking no contract means alt/ok butBA for stone cold fact has contract girls #
• 05:38 @BellaVendetta66 Contract girl supposed to be one who both gives AND gets extra. Prob w/SG talent is all girls give w/o get appropriate 4c #
• 07:35 A good day starts with fair trade artisan roasted espresso iced soy latte, free range eggs & uncured bacon. Today is a good day. 🙂 #

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• 11:31 Fire Meets Desire. Burger King cologne. Really. tinyurl.com/burger-king-cologne #
• 15:59 @ForrestBlack Meow 🙂 #

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Jax – The Horror and Gore Interview

by Amelia G : December 18th, 2008
A while back, we were chatting in the forums about horror movies and gore on film. It occurred to me that outspoken Blue Blood superstar hottie Jax, with her extensive body modifications, would have a very interesting and unique perspective on subjecting the human body to extremes. Definitely a topic which called for an in-depth interview with Jax!

Amelia G: What are some of your favorite horror movies or other media?

Jax: I grew up on the oldies like Nightmare on Elm Street, Texas Chainsaw Massacre and Halloween movies, I remember watching them with my dad when I was really young so I’ll always hold those as some of my favorites. I really, really like almost anything done by Takashi Mike.

Amelia G: What are some of your favorite real gore movies or other media?

Jax: My most favorite real gore are the Faces/Traces of Death series and the movie Cannibal Holocaust (thanks TOA for showing me that real gore movies are out there).

Amelia G: Do you find gore in horror movies scary?

Jax: Scary? Not really. Sometimes some things will make my toes curl, because I have an overactive imagination. But that’s because I’m thinking “Woah, what would that feel like?” or “Yeah, I remember when I did that, and it didn’t feel very pleasant.”

Amelia G: I think a lot of people would be freaked out by seeing someone hung off a hook or someone getting their tongue split or a hole punched out of someone’s flesh in a movie torture scene. Obviously, you have an intriguing and different perspective from the average person because you know what all those things would actually feel like. Do you think that your real life experiences make movie scenes more visceral for you . . .

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Fire Meets Desire

by Amelia G : December 17th, 2008

I’ve always thought that the scent of certain foods should be packaged as cologne. Who wouldn’t want to lick someone who smelled like fresh doughnuts in the morning? Baked goods in general can provoke this sense. I find Mrs. Fields cookies uninteresting as a food, but they smell so damn alluring in the mall; I just want to get close to them. Even certain frozen foods, like Stouffer’s mashed potatoes, smell like the sort of thing that could make a prospective partner’s mouth water. I’d love to have a really good coffee body spray. Heck, I want to roll around naked in a two person tub full of Intelligentsia Black Cat espresso beans.

Taking this concept one step too far, Burger King (aka the people who brought you a pervert Subservient Chicken in garters), have introduced Flame body spray for (I think) men.

I’m going to go out on a limb here and admit that, although I did used to enjoy Burger King chicken tenders, I haven’t eaten them in many many years and I never ever liked the Whopper. On school field trips as a child, I did always vote for Burger King where they sort of had food and didn’t object to leaving off the disgusting fast food spreads. BK, where I could have it my way, was clearly superior to McDonald’s where pretty much nothing, except the french fries, was remotely food. Some of my classmates would want to go to a place called Micky D’s and it took me ages to figure out this was a hip (if you are like eight-years-old) way to refer to McDonald’s.

Genius demented ad copy for the body spray scent like working in fast food:

“The WHOPPER sandwich is . . .

( Read more )

• 07:17 @ForrestBlack Snow on the pyramid is like a seal of the apocalypse! #

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• 19:39 My Fabulous Book Club for Fabulous people is meeting at a location from Mad Men tonight! Off I go . . . #

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• 21:21 Happy birthday, Forrest Black! #
• 00:44 @jonnyilluminati Fab Book Club for Fab People I am in read Ayn Rand last. Guess it is a compensation thing. #

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• 14:33 @Very_Wiley Sorry to hear that. #
• 14:54 @EssinEm I like to use birthdays to both madden and entertain myself. Personal New Years. Hope yours improves. #
• 14:56 Bratz vs. Barbie tinyurl.com/bratz-vs-barbie #
• 03:13 @aagblog How often does Misanthropy Monday come? I want to make sure I am celebrating the right amount. #
• 03:15 @jonnyilluminati My Fab Book Club for Fab people is discussing a dumb book on the 15th, so your knee surgery is well-scheduled 🙂 #
• 03:17 Want to pull a heist with me? tinyurl.com/boomtown-heist #

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Sometimes the amount of fake pseudo-anonymous sock puppet astroturfing BS on the internet really annoys me. I am so so so sick and tired of artificial everymen pretending to have opinions which help some dick’s agenda. If not for the danger of Big Brother, I really would wish internet profiles had to be registered to actual human beings, one per person please.

Then again, sometimes real people annoy me too.

Fake ones do feel worse though because it is not like you could find out that they love their dog or have the same favorite books you do. There is no common ground with an artificial web site account.