journal Archive

Nyet

Wow, I blew off working out so long that I didn’t even know my trainer went to Moscow for the month. Guess I’m off to run errands and work out without a taskmaster. Better do it anyway before I totally climb the walls.

Forrest rules! He just made a free potd for BarelyEvil.com!

BarelyEvil.com
Free Pic of the Day

Forrest rules! He just made a free potd for BarelyEvil.com!

BarelyEvil.com
Free Pic of the Day

Self-portrait

This is an arty old self portrait I did when I was first really learning how to use a camera:

This is an arty old self portrait I did when I was first really learning how to use a camera:

Titties for dingopariah and others

Got the awesome Maitresse Jennifer of The Nuns up on RubberDollies.com now! Plus new Szandora on GothicSluts.com

Got the awesome Maitresse Jennifer of The Nuns up on RubberDollies.com now! Plus new Szandora on GothicSluts.com

Sometimes it is really pretty okay to be me

So the old friend I emailed was still checking that address. She actually doesn’t live in Los Angeles, but happens to be here through Tuesday. And she was just thinking of me too. Weird synchronicity.

So, in the spirit of taking some me time, I spent like the entire day today having really a lot of sex. Other people take real weekends, but I’m a workaholic, so I feel a little guilty but pretty fucking good too. So I’m behind on my site updates, although I did just post a Raven Dorman set to GothicSluts.com Also I’m really sore. Another excellent excuse to avoid returning my trainer’s calls for another week.

Actually, I’ve lost ten pounds and gained kind of a bunch of muscle this past month.

And my wisdom tooth sockets are finally starting to heal.

Got a bunch of new energy, but figuring out where to allocate it is a trick. Giving rise to a fuck of a lot of soul-searching.

I feel like Rip Van Winkle, like I’ve been asleep for a few years and now I’m like whoa where did the time go . . . but the world better look out now because I’ve been running at maybe 1/10th capacity for quite a while. Now that I am feeling more like myself, it will probably be good for a lot of people, but I will also be more of an unstoppable juggernaut and I suspect that will cause some folks who thought they were just about to get it up to compete with me to feel pretty bad. Good.

Back to site updates for me.

So the old friend I emailed was still checking that address. She actually doesn’t live in Los Angeles, but happens to be here through Tuesday. And she was just thinking of me too. Weird synchronicity.

So, in the spirit of taking some me time, I spent like the entire day today having really a lot of sex. Other people take real weekends, but I’m a workaholic, so I feel a little guilty but pretty fucking good too. So I’m behind on my site updates, although I did just post a Raven Dorman set to GothicSluts.com Also I’m really sore. Another excellent excuse to avoid returning my trainer’s calls for another week.

Actually, I’ve lost ten pounds and gained kind of a bunch of muscle this past month.

And my wisdom tooth sockets are finally starting to heal.

Got a bunch of new energy, but figuring out where to allocate it is a trick. Giving rise to a fuck of a lot of soul-searching.

I feel like Rip Van Winkle, like I’ve been asleep for a few years and now I’m like whoa where did the time go . . . but the world better look out now because I’ve been running at maybe 1/10th capacity for quite a while. Now that I am feeling more like myself, it will probably be good for a lot of people, but I will also be more of an unstoppable juggernaut and I suspect that will cause some folks who thought they were just about to get it up to compete with me to feel pretty bad. Good.

Back to site updates for me.

Once upon a time, there was a girl I was really close friends with. We were closer times when she didn’t have a boyfriend because she was one of those chicks who really really adapts to her man and sometimes likes to rewrite history in the process. But we were tight in varying degrees for twelve years. Early this month, I found myself wondering what to get her for her birthday and then realized that it had been years since that was an issue. Earlier today, I sort of dumped someone I wasn’t even dating because I obviously was not going to be able to be friends without sexual tension. I started speaking to my father again this year, partly because I got some new information about the things which upset me and partly because he was coming up on the age his father died at. I thought I would want to talk things out with him, but really I just wanted to be able to say hello to him from time to time, hear his voice on the phone. I’ve found a bunch of people from past lives through journal stuff. Makes me want to be more personal and real here. Really trying to figure things out and tidy up my human relations. I wish I could talk to my grandmother about what I’m thinking about, what I’m going through. I think she would get it. Of course, she is dead and she went crazy before that. Just found out an ugly family secret about what killed her which is really fucking with my head. Anyway, I hope my old girlfriend calls me or emails back because I just dropped her a line. Not that I want to tell her about the other things I wrote here. I just want to get my house in order and that human contact is part of it.

Maybe this is too personal, but I can always delete it later and post some tittie pictures.

Tidying My Human Relations

Once upon a time, there was a girl I was really close friends with. We were closer times when she didn’t have a boyfriend because she was one of those chicks who really really adapts to her man and sometimes likes to rewrite history in the process. But we were tight in varying degrees for twelve years. Early this month, I found myself wondering what to get her for her birthday and then realized that it had been years since that was an issue. Earlier today, I sort of dumped someone I wasn’t even dating because I obviously was not going to be able to be friends without sexual tension. I started speaking to my father again this year, partly because I got some new information about the things which upset me and partly because he was coming up on the age his father died at. I thought I would want to talk things out with him, but really I just wanted to be able to say hello to him from time to time, hear his voice on the phone. I’ve found a bunch of people from past lives through journal stuff. Makes me want to be more personal and real here. Really trying to figure things out and tidy up my human relations. I wish I could talk to my grandmother about what I’m thinking about, what I’m going through. I think she would get it. Of course, she is dead and she went crazy before that. Just found out an ugly family secret about what killed her which is really fucking with my head. Anyway, I hope my old girlfriend calls me or emails back because I just dropped her a line. Not that I want to tell her about the other things I wrote here. I just want to get my house in order and that human contact is part of it.

Maybe this is too personal, but I can always delete it later and post some tittie pictures.

You are the discontent at the heart of us all. The
sodden anger that is left when all excuses fail
their parity tests, when all of our friends
have left us, when the wind ceases its singing
and becomes a low, lonesome wail. Relish this
moment of abandonment, of disappointment. Let
the rage and anger have their sway. You have
been too accepting for too long, have allowed
too many injustices to sweep over you. Become
one with this anger. You are the searing flame
that purifies the world. And it’s a really
stupid-looking phone, too.

which clip from a Guns ‘N Roses video are you?
brought to you by Quizilla

Interviews are hard

I just finished answering these interview questions about how I got started. I miss doing punk rock print zines in a house with thirteen people with funny-colored hair plus couch surfers where we regularly staple-gunned a cockroach to the wall as a warning to the others. I miss throwing legendary punk rock bacchanalias. Barely anyone who reads my journal is going to even know what I’m talking about, but I’m really missing old Cambodia today.

If I try to trade in my Town Car for something sporty and convertible, somebody please bitchslap me.

Thanks a lot Vaughn

You are the discontent at the heart of us all. The
sodden anger that is left when all excuses fail
their parity tests, when all of our friends
have left us, when the wind ceases its singing
and becomes a low, lonesome wail. Relish this
moment of abandonment, of disappointment. Let
the rage and anger have their sway. You have
been too accepting for too long, have allowed
too many injustices to sweep over you. Become
one with this anger. You are the searing flame
that purifies the world. And it’s a really
stupid-looking phone, too.

which clip from a Guns ‘N Roses video are you?
brought to you by Quizilla