LJ Interview meme

LJ Interview meme from dingopariah

1. Speaking as a photographer, how large does a penis have to be before it can be considered “display quality”?

I think shape and skin texture are more important for display quality. Oh, and ability to maintain an erection in unusual circumstances with the lights on. Size is partly relative on camera i.e. has more to do with size of penis in proportion to the person, instead of the absolute size of something that either could or could not pound a pussy well. Style and star quality are more important than penis size and I’ll try harder to make someone I think is hot look good in all departments. A good photographer should be able to put the right angle on a nice boi’s thang. At least, I’ve repeatedly had male models marvel at how big their cocks look when photographed by your truly.

2. Blind nostalgia notwithstanding, is there anything you miss about DC?

Yes. I miss the sense of community I got when I first got there. I miss the intense sense of having finally come home to where I truly belonged. I miss having a large posse of people who might be hostile in private but would have my back in public. I miss making scenes in public places. I miss the freedom of having nothing to lose. I miss the optimism I used to have about my friends’ potential. I regret that I could not even take Sarah with me because she did not have the stamina for the journey. I miss hanging out with people who genuinely were into what they were into, not just auditioning for a part. I miss the East Coast SF conventions because they were for people with more varied interests, rather than just the rabid fans of one TV show. I miss being some place where if someone said they liked Nine Inch Nails, it meant that either (a) they liked NIN or (b) they wanted to fuck me or (c) they wanted to fuck someone I know, as opposed to some complex starfucker business reason. Sometimes I miss the instant focus group action of living in a group house where I could just walk out of my office and ask someone if something sucked or was cool. I miss the comradery. I miss some of those legendary punk rock Cambodia parties. I miss having a place to hand out punk rock zines where people got it. But I know the things I miss were just moments in time and they could not and did not last. I left because the moments were fewer and farther between and the geography just reminded me of what I was missing.

All in all, though, if the choice was trying to make ephemeral moments last forever or growing up to genuinely impact and change the aesthetics of the world around me and make a difference for a lot of people and sign a lot of autographs and roll in a Town Car. Well, I’d make the same choices again. Might stop back for a visit some time though.

3. Given the choice of five years in a state penitentiary or informing to the police on your acquaintances illegal activities, what would you do?

I would photograph my most-likely-to-crack friend patching the bullet holes in the side of the house, so that I would have leverage to make sure he did not want to talk to the police and our stories would match if we had to. There is always a choice besides enslavement or losing your soul. Just gotta think out of the box. At heart, I suppose I am an optimist (and a lawyer’s kid like you) and I always believe there is another option, if the ones before me are loathsome.

4. What is the ugliest thing you see every day? (Or almost every day.)

That net photo of the guy pulling open his bleeding asshole with both hands.

5. What is the last object you threw (not tossed), and for what reason?

My mouse. My hand hurt from working too much and the mouse was not performing up to expectations and needed to be taught a lesson.